It's Been A Bad Day (but I'll take a picture)

Sometimes 140 characters just isn't enough to capture a day's experience fully. It started with a 2 minute stop at UCL (University College London) that was far longer than expected.

I'm due to begin studying Psychology at UCL this September but before my place is confirmed I have to prove that I have met the conditions of my offer. I dutifully scanned my relevant certificates and emailed them to the admissions department. They informed me that emailed copies were (understandably) not sufficient and they required either the originals or copies verified by my college. Loathe to entrust valuable documents to the vagaries of the Royal Mail I began attempting to in touch with my college. It seems they had shut up shop for the summer, yet failed to provide any details as to if/when they will be reopening.

This is what lead to today's visit to my prospective place of study, in order to deliver my certificates by hand. What I had envisioned being a quick stop at the main entrance to hand over my documents, turned into over an hour of being sent from one building to the next in a fruitless search for a faculty office which no one appears to have ever encountered before. Finally I entrusted my package to the University's internal mail and left with my fingers crossed.

This of course lead to me arriving 5 minutes late for work. Normally this would have passed without note but not today. As I arrived at the cinema's entrance I was just in time to see the entrance shutters finish their descent and shut me out.

The only times these shutters close are i) the last customer has left at the end of the night and it's time to go home, or ii) the building is being evacuated.

After making my way down to the meeting point to join my colleagues I learnt that an electrical fault had lead to all of us being stood outside in the cold. For 40 minutes.

When we finally made it back inside I quickly changed into my uniform in time to come down and help deal with the several hundred customers stood waiting downstairs.

Most people were understanding and quick to deal with but there are always those few difficult ones. The ones who seem to view the events as some kind of deliberate attempt on my part to spoil not only their evening, but possibly their very life. With these you just set your apology levels to stun and raise your shield's against their barrage with a big fake smile.

So my entire evening was dealing with the aftermath of an evacuation (which happened before I even started) and doing my best to just keep on smiling at the people I felt like screaming at. My favourite complaint of the night? "The seats are at the wrong pitch" What?

On the plus side, I did meet Gary Newman/Numan(?). Which was nice.

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Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps

Do you remember the sitcom Coupling? It ran from 2000 to 2004 and spanned four series and introduced us to Jack Davenport (of MasterCard advertising voice-over fame). At the time it was the cult comedy of choice for all the coolest cats.

Written by Steven Moffat, who based it on personal experience and even gave his name to the male lead, it was often described as 'the British Friends'. It was far from a Anglicized version of the US behemoth of comedy, with far more in common with the comedic style of Seinfeld and a very British approach in its Frank discussions of sex.

Bearing all this in mind, it is somewhat surprising that I had all but forgotten the show until a friend reminded me of it today. Luckily the modern age we live in means I quickly rectified this with clips from YouTube. If you have fond memories of the show I suggest you do the same.

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YEEAAAAHHHHHH!

I used to love CSI: Miami - in fact I was a huge fan of all three fantastic CSI flavours until The Wire came along and ruined all other cop shows for me - especially the ridiculously corny opening sequences featuring David Caruso as Horatio Caine.

Yes, he is putting a 2nd set of sunglasses on over the 1st set

As shown in the technical diagram above, there would be a feeder line (usually from another character), a setup line, then a terrible pun delivered as Horatio dons his sunglasses, before the screeching vocal of the theme tune (Won't Get Fooled Again by The Who) kicks in.

It is terrible but in a brilliant way, as the example below demonstrates:


Even Jim Carrey loves it:

Great Opening Lines

"People often ask me how I know Tyler Durden"
- Fight Club

"Are you watching closely?"
- The Prestige

"I need your clothes, your boots, and your motorcycle."
- The Terminator

"I was 12 going on 13 the first time I saw a dead human being."
- Stand By Me

"I am Gunnery Sergeant Hartman, your senior drill instructor. From now on, you will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last words out of your filthy sewers will be 'Sir!' Do you maggots understand this?"
- Full Metal Jacket

"My name is Lester Burnham. This is my neighborhood. This is my street. This is my life. I'm 42 years old. In less than a year, I'll be dead. Of course, I don't know that yet. And in a way, I'm dead already. Look at me: jerking off in the shower. This will be the high point of my day. It's all downhill from here."
- American Beauty (Not quite the first line but close enough)

‎"What came first, the music or the misery? People worry about kids playing with guns, or watching violent videos, that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?"
- High Fidelity


"As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster. To me, being a gangster was better than being President of the United States."
- Goodfellas

"Say, any of you boys smithies? Or, if not smithies perse, were you otherwise trained in the metallurgic arts before straitened circumstances forced you into a life of aimless wanderin'?"
- O Brother Where Art Thou?

"We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold."
- Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

-----------------------------------------------------
And the greatest of them all?

"Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family, Choose a f--king big television. Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed-interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suit on hire purchased in a range of f--king fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the f--k you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sittin' on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing f--king junk food into your mouth. Choose rottin' away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarassment to the selfish, f--ked-up brats that you've spawned to replace yourself. Choose a future. Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life. I chose somethin' else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you've got heroin?"
- Trainspotting

Mel is alot Madder than Max ever was

I've been on a Mel Gibson kick tonight. First there was Edge of Darkness in which Ray Winstone stole the show, followed by the first of the Mad Max films.

I wasn't overly impressed with Edge of Darkness, Mel's dodgy Massachusetts accent and a poorly explained plot left me bored and frustrated. Mad Max on the other hand was a delightful surprise.

I must have watched it at some point in my teens, but I find it hard to imagine that I would only remember the sequels if I had. It's clearly B-movie material from start to finish yet it manages to stand out from that mediocre crowd.

The angel faced Mel Gibson shines in the role and shows no sign of his current instability (he gets through the entire film without out any racist tirades) providing us with a cinematic record of Mel being Mad... but not as mad as he is now.

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The Case of The Missing Hotdog

One of the staff members at the cinema I work at may lose their job because of a missing mouthful of hotdog and I am partly responsible.

It won't be me making the decision as to whether they remain with us, and I didn't have anything to do with the morsel of meat disappearing. I was merely the supervisor on the shift and noticed that a previously whole hotdog was no longer so.

I was therefore duty bound to determine the whereabouts of the missing sausage, questioning staff and diligently sifting through an entire bin in a fruitless search. If it is determined that the staff member ate a bite of the hotdog (which the evidence certainly suggests is the case) they may lose their job.

It seems ridiculous that such a trivial incident could leave someone unemployed. I have no qualms over the termination (of employment) for those found stealing money, repeatedly turning up late or generally under-performing, but firing someone for eating part of an item that is only worth pennies to the company seems such a waste.

This isn't the first time a member of staff has thrown away their job for a mouthful of food and I doubt it will be the last, I just hope that next time they do it on someone else's shift and save me the moral headache.

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Deer Rape, Office Olympics and Flying Children

At least I have episodes of =3 to cheer me up

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Motivation (or lack thereof)

It is times such as this that I miss my religious beliefs. Finding myself down in the dumps I could turn to my imaginary friend in the sky for spiritual assistance. Since the scales have fallen from my eyes and I've seen the light of Atheism this false comfort has been lost to me.

Sometimes ignorance does have its advantages...

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Headlines - Wednesday 10th March 2010

There is no evidence acupuncture or Chinese herbal medicine increase the chance of getting pregnant through IVF, fertility experts say in new guidance. The methods are increasingly offered as a way of boosting the chances of a baby, but the British Fertility Society suggests couples may be wasting money. (Well duh! - BBC News)

Large Hadron Collider to shut down for a year to address safety concerns (BBC News)

Lost Jewish tribe 'found in Zimbabwe'. They do not eat pork, they practise male circumcision, they ritually slaughter their animals, some of their men wear skull caps and they put the Star of David on their gravestones. (BBC News) Oh, and they also have the Ark of the Covenant!

 


Porn internet domain name 'dot.xxx' plan revived three years after it was rejected by internet regulators. (BBC News)

Hard drive evolution could hit Microsoft XP users. By early 2011 all hard drives will use an "advanced format" that changes how they go about saving the data people store on them. However, it might mean problems for Windows XP users who swap an old drive for one using the changed format. (BBC News)

British Telecom's chief executive, Ian Livingston, says illegal file-sharers should be fined rather than have their internet accounts cut off (BBC News)

The driving test should have compulsory questions on level crossings to cut the number of drivers who take risks on them each year, Network Rail has said. (BBC News)

Royal Mail sets its sights on delivering more junk mail. [Royal Mail] insists that removing the cap on junk mail deliveries will not lead to householders receiving more items. (Yeah right! - BBC News)

Deforestation has revealed what could be a giant impact crater in Central Africa, scientists say. The 36-46km-wide feature, identified in DR Congo, may be one of the largest such structures discovered in the last decade. (BBC News)

Suddenly Sunday

It's gone midnight which means Sunday is now upon us! The traditional day of rest and this week I feel I've earned it.

My Saturday began with the alarm waking me from my slumber at the sickeningly early time of 6am after a scant 4 hours sleep. My shift was not until 4.30 that afternoon so why was I inflicting such torture upon myself? Unfortunately for me I had to attend a fire drill and staff meeting at 9am, the lengthy journey meaning it would not be feasible to return home between the two.

I didn't waste these hours in which I was stuck at work. I packed another bag with my laptop and text books and squeezed in some studying whilst trying to stay awake. So while I am now utterly exhausted I feel like I've achieved something from the day and can now enjoy a guilt free lazy Sunday.

Woes of Working

I know I'm lucky to have a job in the current economic climate, so please don't take the following rant as my being ungrateful, but...

I've now started my fourth week at work but as yet have yet to receive any money. This is not particularly unusual, we're paid fortnightly and a week in arrears so these first few weeks are bound to be hard. This doesn't make living through the situation any easier. Having been without work for the previous six months my funds were already low, and travelling into Zone 1 on the Tube for my shifts isn't cheap! The result is that I'm rapidly approaching the point at which I cannot afford to go to work!

In the meantime, I'm just returning from my shift tonight and will be working again tomorrow night until midnight. Unfortunately in between the two is a fire drill at 9am for which attendance is mandatory. This means my entire Saturday (from 9am to midnight) will be spent at work with a big chunk of hours for which I won't be paid.

I'm just having a bit of a moan. I can't do anything about there things so all I'm left with is a good old rant. I do like my job and I'm grateful I've got it, I just wish I had a bit more money and a bit more sleep.

Musical Marvels

A few videos with a musical theme for you today. Want to see a rap battle between two of the world's greatest economic theorists?
"Fear the Boom and Bust" a Hayek vs. Keynes Rap Anthem


Next a mashup of the Top 25 Hits of 2009, according to Billboard from DJ Earworm (@djearworm on Twitter).
United State of Pop 2009 (Blame It on the Pop)

Check out his website for more info on tracks used, how it was created and downloadable goodies.

A mashup of a different sort next as Metallica's 'Enter Sandman' meets tune of the moment, 'Don't Stop Believing' by Journey
ROCK SUGAR - Don't Stop The Sandman


I leave you with a video that has been doing the rounds recently and seems to provoke differing reactions in those who view it. I think it's unsettling but a great creation nonetheless, let me know what you think.
Die Antwoord - Enter The Ninja

The Fantastic Mr Fox

Just got done watching 'The Fantastic Mr Fox' and I'd have to say it lives up to it's name. A stop motion animation based on the book by Roald Dahl (the great children's writer), directed by Wes Anderson (Rushmore, The Royal Tenenbaums, The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou) and with the voice talent of George Clooney (two-time People Magazine 'Sexiest Man Alive' winner) it's a fantastic piece of work. Check out the trailer:


Visually it's superb. The quality of the animation and the colour pallette used throughout the film are so beautiful. The character voicing, especially by Clooney, are also excellent. All of this is tied together by the masterful Wes Anderson at the helm and you could pick any scene from the film and within moments you would recognise his hand at work upon it.

It's not the 'Perfect Mr Fox' however. I think that children wouldn't find this film as enjoyable as I did and they must surely be the ones for whom this was being made. The style and dialogue just doesn't seem tailored for a younger audience. Another, more minor, quibble is the film's mix of US actors for the animal character's and UK actor's for the humans.

Ideally the whole thing should have been a British production but that's not how these things work. The rules are that UK actors can be stars on US TV shows but when it comes to films they want a Yank up front. I've no problem with that, just a little confused about where the film is actually being set and such. British farmers and an Opossum in the same film doesn't seem right.

Opossum - Hand not included

All in all I thoroughly enjoyed it and would recommend you catching Mr Fox if you can.

Cyanide & Happiness

The folks at Explsom! are probably best known for their fantastic web comics:

That's some funny stuff right there!

But they also create animated shorts which I really adore and I thought I'd share a few with you. (Warning - Most of these are probably a bit NSFW)

The Sign

Short and to the point, as is...

The Race


Here's two slightly longer ones to finish up, and of course I've saved the best one for last:

Beer Run


Waiting For The Bus


If you like their stuff check out them out at Explosm! or follow them on Twitter (@Explosm)

Video's of the day - 16/02/2010

Some YouTube video's for you to check out:

The PUMA HardChorus

The first time I saw this I was equal parts terrified and captivated. It's a viral campaign from Puma linking football and Valentine's day by imagining what it would be like to be serenaded by a bunch of thuggish looking football fans. It's a great concept and I wish they'd follow it up as I'd love to hear more tracks performed in this manner.

Until that happens I'll just have to make do with the video Puma did for the campaign in Italy:
Puma Il Serenata

If anything this is even better than the English one and has been stuck in my head all day (aided perhaps by my repeated viewings of the video)

It's late so just the two video's for you now.

Remember if you ever want to download a YouTube video, KickYouTube comes in pretty handy

And now for something completely different

Like many would be bloggers, I've found it difficult to keep up the necessary levels of motivation and dedication required to continually update a blog. For me this is often because I'm distracted by many other things and find it difficult to come up much to say on just a single topic. It's very much a case of my being too widely spread, and at the same time shallow in my thinking. Recognising that I am unlikely to change this any time soon I have decided to embrace rather than repress this side of me and provide blog content which more closely mirrors the magpie like nature of my intellect.

Oh a shiny thing... where was I?

"I like to share things I find on the internet." That's kind of my catchphrase and is evident in the number of links I post on Twitter and Facebook. Believe it or not, I restrain myself from posting everything I would like to share for fear of overwhelming people even more than I currently do. So I have a blog I update rarely and struggle to find things to talk about and Twitter & Facebook accounts clogged with too many links and not enough conversation... Eureka!

I will henceforth be trying to use my blog more frequently, and at the same time reduce the clutter on my other feeds, by gathering these links to internet trinkets and baubles together and putting them on my blog.

Initially this will probably be collections of YouTube videos. Instead of posting several links in a row as I finishing watching each one I'll try to restrain myself and just pop them in a blog post. In fact I think I'll do so right now...


Let me know what you think about my idea and if you have any other suggestions on how to make my life as a blogger easier

Survivors

I'm a sucker for post-apocalyptic fiction and it's rare that I come across an example of the genre that doesn't captivate my interest. So why is it that I'm struggling to bring myself to watch any more of the BBC's series 'Survivors'?

Shown on BBC One in prime-time it is clearly a key part of the Beeb's early 2010 programming. This is the second season and tonight saw the broadcast of it's second episode but it's unlikely I'll be tuning in for the third episode.

I must start by saying that I missed the first season, not by choice I just didn't realise it was on until the season had finished. That being said I started watching the second season having done my homework. I'd watched the recap clips and read the episode guides and so had an overview of what to expect. Unfortunately none of this preparation lead me to expect such poor quality from a flagship show. The dialogue is nearly unbearable at times, tonight's episode in particular had the token child (Naj - because Najid is too long to say repeatedly it seems) spouting awful lines and behaving in a manner that apocalypse-or-not would have earned him a slap if I'd been around.

I'm used to forgiving Sci-Fi and Fantasy fiction for it's many flaws in exchange for a look at the worlds they provide but I can't seem to bring myself to grant 'Survivors' this concession. Not knowing the details of the first series I can't really comment on why the minuscule number of survivors are starving to death in a major metropolitan city. I can comment on the fact that the show seems to be geared around constantly placing the 'Survivors' into perilous predicaments (they clearly haven't been through enough in surviving the downfall of civilisation).

The previous series concluded with one character laying shot in the raid by sinister men in black which saw another character kidnapped. The new series picked up immediately from this point with the group racing to save the life of their fallen comrade by visiting the nearest hospital. This was the setup for an episode in which a hospital collapses upon half the gang, Max Beesley gets to slow motion run through a lot of dust holding a shotgun, the shot character has a fever flashback and another female character has to submit to being raped in order to obtain a rather pitiful piece of rescue equipment:

There is clearly an attempt to focus on the relationships and the emotions of this handful of individuals forced together by the apocalypse. This is muddied by the stories insistence that they spend their time shouting at each other, running for their lives or laying very still (either under rubble, on a table bleeding to death or in a sinister lab surrounded by figures in Haz-Mat suits). The two aims don't work on screen at all, in the hands of better writers or with better actors perhaps this wouldn't be the case, other works have managed it (none perhaps more skilfully than Stephen King's 'The Stand').

It is disappointing that a big BBC One show, in a genre for which I am a fan of and aimed squarely at the demographic I inhabit, can fail to arouse more than minimal interest from me. This wasn't helped by the decision to have a two week gap between the first and second episodes due to the football - this isn't America, scheduling should be continuous.

Next week I think I shall be re-watching Skeet Ulrich in 'Jericho' instead.

A Little Look Around

Quick video tour of my tiny room:



It isn't much, and it normally looks a hell of a lot messier, but I call it home.

The Prestige

A short video I made about the film 'The Prestige' as part of my continuing experimentation with social media:

Facebook copying Twitter again?

Ten minutes of searching Twitter, Facebook, Google & Mashable have turned up no other posts regarding what appears to be Facebook's latest homage to one of Twitter's lesser known features... the "via".

Since Twitter brought in their controversial new retweet feature, it seems the use of "via" to indicate the user who provided the original link has fallen into disuse. Those who feared it was therefore lost forever will be thankful to hear that Facebook have seen fit to resurrect it.

When you see a post on another user's Facebook feed, you are presented with a 'Share' button through which you can post the item in question to your own feed. So far so social media, right? Well previously these shared posts to your feed were unattributed. This meant you could pass the link off as your own (to those people who don't follow the user you stole it from anyway) but now Facebook are making an effort to show your 'Friends' who it was that originally created the post by adding a "via" followed by the user's name. This is in no way similar to Twitter's new retweet feature that makes an effort to show your 'Followers' who it was that originally created the post.

Apart from making people look a little less cool (now that you can see that it is one of their more interesting friends who was actually providing all those awesome YouTube links to cute cats) the point to note here is Facebook's continuing drive to encourage it's users to widen their online social circle. Why show where posts are originating from (with a handy clickable link) if you don't want to encourage more socialising on your social network?

I have no problem with this new feature (being the guy who finds all those cute kitty videos) but many others may feel that Facebook's continual erosion of user privacy and it's attempts to force them to make new 'Friends' may be less appealing.

Update
Since I made my post last night, Mashable have written their own piece about Facebook's newest feature.